Pancake Day 2009--first annual:)

A few random notes before I start my reflections...

~I LOVE my friendships. I love the joy they bring in my life. I love that shared history, good and bad, brings us closer, like a family. I love sharing meals with them. I love the laughter that filled my small little place tonight!

~I'm writing this from my laptop in my bedroom! Normally this would be no big deal. But my wireless has not been connected correctly for months now. Thanks to Rob and Steve, I now can travel any where in my small little condo and still be connected.

~Inviting friends over and then making them cook is a fantastic idea!

I'll spare you of a few other thoughts. But I'm content tonight. Well, more filled with joy. Blessed by where I'm at even when there are still things to do, change, experience. I'm thankful.


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I often miss the season of Lent. I didn't grow up in a church that participated in Ash Wednesday. Sometimes Lent was discussed but often it was missed, or not explained very well. So many times I couldn't figure out why so many people had dirt on their foreheads. This year I wanted to learn more about the tradition. Learn the basis for it. Was there something to this season worth participating for myself? And I came across Pancake Day. Celebrated in Britian and Ireland (and a few other countries), it's similar to Fat Tuesday. I love pancakes.

I invited friends over and we enjoyed pancakes, eggs, bacon, fruit and some chocolate covered strawberries. Conversation. Laughter. Community. I forget sometimes how much I love having people over. Life has sped up to a near frantic pace at times. And while I have a lot of fun, I have become tired of trying to do too much. And I've had to stop doing things and say no to a lot this year. But sometimes I have cut the wrong things out of my life. Tonight was a reminder that besides the tax benefits and the roof over my head, my quiet little condo also must be shared. I love quiet moments with just Thornton (my cat) and I. But I also love to have people to enjoy my time here.

After dinner a few of us remained to watch Chocolat. Set during Lent, it was a perfect movie to kick of this season. Full of grace for those who need it the most. And a reminder that sometimes love looks different than the rules and expectations we place on it. What struck me most was how much love was expressed outside the church. How unconditional love looked from one woman could be who refused to follow rules that were no longer about God but about power and control. To bring joy and happiness into a simple world. And the antithesis of her grace was the hate and nonsense from the town church. That God became a burden to his followers and the joy and freedom Christ promised was absent. It weighs on my heart that the church so often is not the expression of Christ's love as intended. Although it still can be found. I still see it. But I find myself angry and bitter so often at those who call themselves Christians. (and still remind myself that I too am broken, bitter, and full of that which does not reflect God's love either). What if the church could look at God with longing for peace and compassion? What would it look like if the church could remember that Christ came for all, and most importantly for the the sick not the self righteous and "perfect"? Where would Christ most likely be today? Probably not in a fancy church building. More likely in the streets, with children and orphans, the outcasts, those we make quick judgments about their worth based on the clothes they wear or the car they drive. What happened to the example Jesus showed in three years of ministry? Can we remember what Christ was preparing himself for in the days to come?

There is a scene that showed the crucfix above the mayor of the city who had spread the hate and fear to those in the church and town. "Look, I've been off this cross for 2000 years" is the comment from a friend. That brough laughter but a moment of truth as well. Christ's suffering didn't mean that we were supposed to remain in death during our live times. He conquered death so that we could all have life. He didn't need to remain nailed to the cross any longer. An empty tomb on Sunday means that we can also come out of our tombs and truly live. What would our lives look like if we had more joy? more love? hope? acceptance and encouragement? I'm not willing to give up on this. And while somedays I'm first to curse the sillness, hate, ignorance, and often stupidity of some within the church, I also see those who exhibit those qualities Jesus lived, died and conqued the grave for. He loved the church with and unconditional love. Loved his people and continued time and again mercy and grace when we least deserved. A parent accpeting a child. A lover calling his beloved home. A friend forgiving. A creator who is redeeming his creation.

I start this Lent off giving up something. This year it's trash TV. well more of the extra hours I spend watching mindless episodes even where there is nothing on. Or watching Real World or Real Housewives of Orange County--because who really needs to watch them anyway. I'm doing it to use that time to so something more honoring to God in these next 40 days. But watching this movie tonight, there is a peace that I give it not as a burden, but a willing sacrifice to invest in my relationship with God. To sit and listen to his still small whipsers. To talk. To restore the brokenness I have caused. To know that in the end my giving up something is so small. But opening my heart, letting it be transformed is really what God desires the most. He wants me. Loves me. Sacrificed more than I can imagine and calls to me over and over again. Despite my faults and failures, my hypocricy, my own hate, selfishness and greed, He still opens his arms wide and comes running to me. And only through that love for me can I learn to love others. May I come closer this Lent season to being a better reflection of Christ. And may their be joy in my offering.